Upon separation, a couple has to agree on child arrangements. These arrangements will determine who the child lives with and who has parental responsibility.

Parental responsibility includes things like discipline, protection and maintenance, providing a home, agreeing to the child's medical treatment and choosing and providing for the child's education.

If you've separated and are now faced with making child arrangements, you might ask: "does my child have a say?"

This is a complicated question, but the short answer is "no" – not unless the parents are unable to reach an agreement and matters have been taken to court. In that case, it may be that an independent body called Cafcass is brought in to interview the child and take into account their wishes and feelings – but not always.

Before we get into this eventuality, let's cover some key terminology and look at how child arrangements tend to work.

A word on terminology

Child arrangement orders used to be called "child custody", with one parent taking "custody" of the child. Parents would agree to custody (who the child would live with) and access (when and how often the child would see their absent parent).

"Access and custody" became "contact and residence" – but since 2014 those terms, too, have been replaced by "child arrangement orders".

You might still hear people refer to child custody. For the purposes of this article, though, we'll be using the official term.

How do child arrangements work?

As we said, upon separation, parents have to decide who the child will live with and how often the child will see the absent parent.

A key principle of child arrangements is that the ideal situation is one where the child lives with one parent and sees the other but both parents have responsibility for them. This is known as "joint responsibility" and is the desired outcome after separation. It's considered best for the child's welfare.

Sometimes, however, one parent might be considered unfit to have parental responsibility. In this case, they may still have access to the child but not responsibility.

Most child arrangements are agreed on outside of court. They only go to court if an agreement can't be reached and mediation has failed. Again, a key principle here is that it's in the child's best interests for an agreement to be reached without the turmoil of court proceedings.

Children over 10 can attend mediation. This is in line with the UN Convention on the Rights of the Child, which the UK has signed up to. It aims to give them space to make their feelings and wishes known.

If mediation breaks down, matters are taken to court and the court has to issue an arrangement order.

What happens if child arrangements are taken to court?

If there are court proceedings, the judge's decision is based on the best interests of the child.

The wishes and feelings of the child will be considered but aren't determinative – although the older the child is, the more weight their views will carry.

A point at which the views of the child are instrumental is when the independent body Cafcass becomes involved. This is an independent body of social workers with family expertise.

Cafcass stands for Children and Family Court Advisory and Support Service. It was set up in 2001 and is independent of courts, social services and other public agencies. Its function is to make sure that any court arrangements are safe for the child, and operates under the principle that the child is at the heart of the family.

Cafcass can become involved in court proceedings when either parent makes an application to the court. This will happen when there's an insoluble disagreement about child arrangements.

The judge may order a Cafcass officer to produce a report which outlines the wishes and feelings of the children involved. Cafcass officers are trained to speak with children sensitively and represent their wishes in the unfamiliar and intimidating court environment.

Before the hearing, a Cafcass officer will spend time with the family. Their report will involve interviews with parents and children along with relevant local authority checks. It will assess what both parents are saying and balance their wishes against those of the child. The child's wishes, feelings, age, emotional well-being and long-term best interests will all be taken into account.

The court will use the report's recommendations as a basis for its decisions, alongside

• The child's wishes and feelings – including their age and comprehension of the situation.
• Their physical, emotional and educational needs.
• How the child arrangement order could affect the child.
• Any harm the child has suffered or is at risk of suffering.
• Each parent's capacity to meet the child's needs.

Finally, the court may consider the child's relationships with grandparents, uncles and aunts – especially if these relatives take part in looking after the child.

Usually, children aren't asked to give evidence in proceedings, although this isn't always the case.

Is a child arrangement order legally binding?

A child arrangement order usually expires when the child is 16 – unless the order specifically states otherwise. If the absent parent moves back in, the order ceases to be legally binding after six months.

The court doesn't keep an eye on arrangement orders once they've been issued – so they're not always complied with. If one parent isn't following the order, you can ask the court to enforce it.

As circumstances change, so too can the child arrangement order. In all cases, the well-being of the child is paramount.

How long does it take?

This depends on the complexity of the case and its urgency  – for instance if a child is at risk.

Typically, a court hearing will take place around six to eight weeks after the application has been made. It can then take anywhere from six to 12 months to reach the final order.

At Milners, we have a team of expert family solicitors dedicated to getting the best results for our clients. We offer simple, non-judgemental advice and keep you updated each step of the way. If you need representation, get in touch.